Hooray! Possibly. First part of my overcooked attempt at a large story will be up and posted before most of you read this, but hey, introduction in order.
The very first part you may have seen already, but I've taken it out to about 2500 words for the first block. If that's too few or too many or just right for one go, tell me and I'll tweak future bits within reason.
So, for feedbacking the most helpful thing would be if people could do that reading thing and point out anything that isn't right, is wrongly spelled, doesn't make any sense, whatever. Could even point out the (doubtless few) things that are good about it if you felt charitable!
Ze story will be/is being posted in titled chunks, so if you could tell me where the issues are by that naming (or you could quote stuff I guess? not gonna tell you how to do stuff, everyone has their own ways and so on.) that would be much-helpful. Anyway, on with it! Part 1 is up and yeah.
Over to you, I supposes.
"Jane is a con artist. A thief. A liar. A smooth-talking criminal genius with a penchant for the dramatic. I just tend to forget it thanks to the Kheldian." - Shadowe